The late and legendary insult comedian Don Rickles never ran for president, but in Joe Biden we could have a pretty close approximation of what it might have looked like.
It started four years ago, with calling voters “dog faced pony soldiers,” or “fat,” or telling them he knew why their wife left them, and the insults haven’t slowed down one bit.
Let’s take a look at the top five ways the president is insulting us every day.
At West Point’s commencement exercises on May 25, 2024, President Biden once again told the lie that he had been appointed to the U.S. Naval Academy. (Spencer Platt/Getty Images)
1. Hey, Stupid, It’s Not the Economy
At the top of the list of Joe “The Insult President’s” ridiculous whoppers is his insistence that the economy is great and all of us are just too dumb to notice.
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Biden keeps insisting that “America has the best economy in the world,” when every American knows that if things get any more expensive, a burger and fries is going to turn into a burger and fry. He keeps gloating about creating more jobs than any other president, conveniently leaving out that when he took office millions of Americans weren’t allowed to have jobs under penalty of law.
In January 2020, before COVID and under Trump, Gallup’s Economic Confidence Index, which measures how Americans feel about the issue, was at plus 40, a staggering high. Today it has plunged to a near record nadir of negative 34.
But it’s not him, you see, it’s you. Why aren’t you grateful?
2. You’re Gonna Pay for Gender Studies Degrees, Jack!
It was Mark Twain who wrote that “cauliflower is just cabbage with a college education.” What he was saying was that the cost of the endeavor wasn’t worth the final product. Well, Joe Biden has a slick solution for all those interpretive dance majors who can’t even get a gig in a cruise ship musical and hence, can’t repay their loans. You pay for it.
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Are you a plumber who works 10 hours a day? A truck driver keeping America’s goods flowing into stores and homes? Suckers. You should have spent four years smoking weed and learning how horrible America is. Instead you can just foot the bill for the people better than you who made that much wiser choice.
3. Trump’s Trial Isn’t Political, Just Ask Robert De Niro
It was with grave solemnity that Joe Biden told us for months and months that there was nothing political about the lawfare being waged against Donald Trump, but all it took was one conviction for the Insulter in Chief to flash a bizarre and sinister smile when literally asked if the former president was now his political prisoner.
This just days after his campaign held an official event with movie star Robert De Niro steps from the courthouse. The Hollywood legend wasn’t there to give his expert legal analysis. No, he was there in his official campaign capacity to call Trump supporters clowns.
But don’t worry, none of it was political.
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4. Lies. Lies, Lies
Just last month, Joe Biden once again told the lie that he had been appointed to the U.S. Naval Academy, but decided not to go because NFL Hall of Famer Roger Staubach would be stiff competition for starting quarterback on the football team. This was presumably around the time he pretends he was arrested in the Civil Rights movement and presumably before his mythical time in jail with Nelson Mandela.
There are also his years spent driving the big rigs that never happened, and of course, the fact that he never, ever, not even once talked business with his son Hunter, except, of course, for all the dinners and phone conversations he had with Hunter and his, um, business partners.
There are few things more insulting than someone telling you an obvious lie right to your face, and Joe Biden does that pretty much every time his lips move.
5. Ironclad Commitment to Throw Israel Under the Bus
The word “ironclad” hasn’t been bandied about Washington, D.C., as often as it is now since the Monitor battled the Merrimack in the Civil War. But unlike those fearsome foes, Biden’s supposed ironclad support of Israel couldn’t hold dentures in place.
In the eight months since the atrocities committed by Hamas on Oct. 7, the president has gone from backing Israel’s right to defend itself, to scolding our greatest ally in the region to gain a few votes in Dearborn, Michigan. And as is so often the case with feckless fence-sitting, both sides feel insulted and pandered to. After all, it’s what Joe Biden does best.
The list of Biden’s insults just goes on and on, this week he told a Time Magazine reporter that “I can take you, too,” a clear threat to give him some of the old Cornpop treatment. Much of this would be terribly funny if it weren’t so terrifying for the country.
We are being led by an over the hill insult comedian who simply cannot handle the stage.
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David Marcus is a columnist living in West Virginia and the author of “Charade: The COVID Lies That Crushed A Nation.”